Newspaper in need. Help it out. Running for the title "beggar of the year".

 


Wow! Wow! The reminder is set up for April - 1st. Guess what? Not going to donate for the Beggar. This newspaper recently called “The beggar” aka “your friend from the toilet” aka “the sphincter whipper” is asking for donations. The views are low and hence can not monetise from vile advertisements, the readers that digest this are asked at the very bottom of the article if they can donate a little bit.


Karmic exchange here, and those guys that write the articles might have massive chakras disruptions. From writing about east European beggars to writing about east European war, this newspaper contests for the title of “the beggar of the year”. Used to do “lovely” articles that were fuelling stereotypes about negatives of other ethnicities  and now it is asking for a few pounds donation…the nerve of it must be admired.


We imagine thousands of people that have been emotionally impressed about their substandard articles celebrating the downfall of it. Champagne bottles popping for every single donation that didn’t happen. With writers that write for pennies while they are sipping that bland Dosta latte macchiato, I counter attack and I offer my helping hand. I can do what they do and even cheaper in a much bigger quantity. What are you saying “The Beggar”? 


Get a grip! Get them guys writing a bit more content/ words per article and maybe you can give up on begging for donations. 


Indeed inspirational. I will set up for this stratfordsatire some 100 pounds donations requests as I got zero pennies from it so far. 


Moral of the story: when you are a newspaper that pushes pathetically written articles you end up in the hall of fame of the pathetic newspapers. 


This is a satire and should be treated accordingly. Any resemblance to persons, businesses or facts is purely fictional. The opinions expressed on the stratfordsatire.co.uk are entirely those of the individual contributors and do not represent the views of any other organization or person.

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